SPOKANE, Wash. – Spokane County has the highest rate of domestic violence in Washington, according to a 2019 study by the Spokane Regional Domestic Violence Coalition and Providence Healthcare. That study found that one in every three women and one in ten men are victims of domestic violence.
Maritza Oquendo is a local domestic violence survivor who sat down with NonStop Local’s Melinda Lee to share how she’s using the pain of her past to empower others and give back through the same resource that helped her escape her violence and get back on her feet.
“I didn’t even know that I was in domestic violence,” Maritza said, “because I was brought up (to believe) you stayed in the marriage….you stick it out…what goes on indoors, stays indoors.”
Behind closed doors, Maritza was abused by her second husband.
“Every day…throwing things, breaking things, intending to hurt my children, intending to hurt me in so many ways,” Maritza said.
She says it was one of her children’s teachers who pulled her aside one day and changed her life for the better.
“I thank God for the teacher that saw me and thought ‘something is not right,” Maritza said. “She had the resources, she was the one who connected me to WHEN.”
WHEN is the Women’s Healing and Empowerment Network created by Mabel Dunbar to help people like Maritza.
“We provide resources like we give clothing, we give food, we give counseling, we give support depending on what a person might need,” Mabel said.
Her Cleone’s Closet Food Pantry in Airway Heights is one location Mabel uses to provide that support for thousands of people every month, including a lot of people impacted by domestic violence.
“Spokane County is probably one of the worst counties for domestic violence,” Mabel said. “I get calls from women three to four times a week looking for shelter or support or counseling.”
According to the Washington Department of Health, one in eight adults report having been injured by an intimate partner.
“You believe supposedly you can change them, but you really can’t, you really can’t,” said Maritza.
Today, Maritza helps other violence victims through WHEN’s inland northwest shelter.
“They needed a house manager for this transitional home, and I thought ‘wow, I would love that,” Maritza said. “I wanted to give that opportunity to others to understand how important it is to be guided, and let yourself be guided, and what better place than that home where a lot of people ware able to transition and be safe again.”
“One of the things we do with all the individuals that go through our program, the one request we have is they pay it forward,” Mabel said of WHEN.
Mabel said WHEN’s greatest asset is its volunteers, from those who volunteer to deliver donations to volunteers driving clients to appointments, food pantry volunteers, and more. She encourages anyone interested in volunteering their time to reach out through the WHEN page or main line. Financial donations are always appreciated to help WHEN continue providing food, clothes, and other resources to those who seek them.
“We just need support, we need prayers, and we need people to have faith in us,” said Mabel.
“I knew that the only safe place and best counseling was through WHEN,” said Maritza. “It’s been life changing I learn even more with others who are coming out of these situations.”
